Here you will find articles written by Domina Liza: an insight into various aspects of BDSM and fetishism which draw on her experience from all areas of her profession and are intended to give you, the reader, an insight into the many different sides of femdom, BDSM and fetishism from her own personal perspective.
Be sure to check back every week or so, as new articles are added.
More Than One Dimension
In previous articles, we have discussed several elements of what make up a Dominatrix. The aesthetic, the demeanor, the skills, the interests and so on. One element that we are going to touch on lightly today is one that has always been prevalent, and never more so than in todays fast paced Internet culture – perception. The reason for this article is that someone got me thinking today, that with my main passion being CP, and my character (or one side of it – remember this point) being rather stern, that is how I am often perceived. Not a problem at all, this is part of me. It should not be forgotten however, as I have been quoted as saying, that I am not merely a one-dimensional caricature of domination..
How something or someone is perceived can have a huge impact on their lives, careers, and relationships. So, how is a perception built? In short, a ‘perception’ can be described as an outside view of a person, object or place, which is built from several factors. Contributing factors to this view can be word of mouth, records and articles, images and photographs, and of course the presentation of the person, object or place. What has this got to do with you or me? Well, we are analyzing one aspect of Femdom. A common view (although not held by all) is that you are only as good as or equal to your last or most current image or statement. Now, before disagreeing completely, think about the advent of online social networking – research shows that in the case of, for example, Twitter, an individual will (if browsing and not based on recommendation) choose to ‘follow’ someone based on their avatar image, and their last few ‘tweets’. This would seem to provide supporting evidence for the fact that ‘you only get one chance to make a first impression’.
With the female domination and fetish arena being as populated and saturated as it is, perception can be everything. With each female dominant (hopefully) being very much an individual, with a multitude of facets, attributes, skills and traits – it is important that these are properly reflected so that the right kind of people can encounter each other with a view to a positive interaction. So, how do we go about this? Without too much effort is the answer. Being true to yourself is always the best method in any situation – better to be a great version of yourself than a mediocre replica of someone else.
Sometimes, (without changing yourself one bit) you have to let people see you as they want to see you – some people almost have a fear of seeing me as anything less than a cane-wielding authority figure. The very thought that I might enjoy other activities, or god forbid, laugh and joke – is something that they could not even wish to comprehend. And that is fine with me. No lies are being told, and no spectacle displayed – I am merely controlling myself and exposing the relevant side of my true character at a time chosen by me. And that of course is the most important type of control, self control - especially in my line of work. I love whipping, but I would certainly not show that side of my character, or partake in that activity with a 100% foot fetishist, and vice versa. The key thing to take away from this article, is that (if you want to) you can see a little past a perception, and often in doing so discover things that enrich your life. Or, to use an old saying, don't judge a book by it's cover.
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